We sat in front of his house for a while. In the dark.
Suddenly, after a long silence, he began to talk. The knight said he was going to advise me with exactly the same words his own ”protector” had used the first day he took him as his apprentice. I asked him when, although it seemed like a stupid question, even to me. He said tomorrow … and I felt relieved.
That night was the most special one for me. I started to think about the last few days. And nothing else.
The rest will come to me ? Of itself ? Is that even possible ? Was I really ready to enter this realm of pure knowledge ?
But for the first time in my life, I wasn’t just asking, I was listening to myself. Even more, without interrupting me.
So, what was that I was so afraid about ? Was it something real ? Was it inside me ? Was it from the past ? And if I’m not thinking in the proper order, what is the proper order ?
Very quietly, very smoothly, I felt that my thoughts are becoming more articulate. I was capable of understanding them, seeing them through. My fears, my pains, my (dis)beliefs, my quests. I had it all, I have it all. Right here, right now. What’s with the waiting ? What’s with this waste of time ? What’s with this waste of mine ? I fell asleep while the moon was watching me.
In the morning, I was changed, rearranged.
The conversation started extremely determined.
The Knight – Listen to me and listen good. Fear – it does not exist. Eventually, you can call it respect, you can call it patience. Patience to become stronger then you are now. And being stronger, you are hoping to reach further … But I’m telling you, you’ll never be this strong, you’ll never be this brave and you’ll never be so well placed in your quests. Never. Never. Never. Your patience is futile. So is your fear.
It was my turn to smile. I wasn’t just capable of understanding, I was ready to “forge” it. And he understood, too.
The Knight – So, night was your friend, after all.
The Blacksmith – Almost more that I was to myself.
The Knight – Let’s go, today we will take a short trip.
The Blacksmith – I was hoping more of a long journey.
The Knight – Every long journey is made from short trips.